Image of Me

The image of success I had conjured up in my mind did not reconcile with the full length image of the me I stood staring at in the dressing room of Kolhs.

Its hard to talk myself down from such betrayal.

This morning I was elated because my prize size 10 black jeans actually zipped; too tight to wear but they for the first time in 6 years zipped.

But now, bare but panties and bra all I can see is the flab, stretch marks and the miles more to go.

Like when I used to work hard in my room for hours, proud to be putting on the finishing touches, my mom would poke her head in to check on me,

"Oh, Joanna, your off to a good start.. Keep working."

I just have to resolve to the truths:
my room was still a mess (though it was good enough for me.)

and in this moment in front of this mirror, the same is true

..... I just have to keep working!